ಗಮಕ ಸುಧಾ ಧಾರೆ

Owing to various reasons I am unable to actively participate in Pranati's activities. Fortunately for Pranati, and luckily for me, the family of Pranati have been supportive and have taken the responsibility of raising Pranati with me taking a backseat. Anything I say to thank them would be less.

All this will not hold me back from inviting all my friends' for the next event, and here it is.


For my friends who cannot read Kannada, here are the details of the event - "Gamaka Sudha Dhaare"

Gamaka Vachana of a selected part ('Shabarigaadanu atithi daasharathi') from Rashtrakavi Kuvempu's 'Sri Ramayana Darshanam'
by Gamaki Smt. Shobha Shashidhar,
explanation by Gamaki Smt. T.G.Kusuma
on 18 July 2009 at 5PM
at Indian Institute of World Culture, Basavanagudi, Bangalore

Please do attend.

Farewell babies ...

Keechu was hardly 22 days when I brought him home. I was experiencing motherhood for the third time. He couldnt even drink milk from his cup, he could hardly walk and he was sleeping throughout the day. I was doing the feeding cleaning and even burping him, the only thing that I didn’t have to do is change diapers, because he was not wearing them.



He had found a companion in the one month old kitten my son had rescued the previous day. It was an awesome sight to see Keechu and Cudley playing together.



Unfortunately, Cudley met her tragic accidental end a few weeks later and Keechu lost his friend. I decided to play mother again, I wanted Keechu to be happy. So, we got Kateena home.



Dogs grow faster than human babies, but then, they never grow up; they are like spoilt brats always, but very loveable all the same. With sharp teeth like theirs and the curiosity to bite anything they can lay their hands on (in this case their teeth on), we had to keep everything out of their reach. Slowly they moved from being free beings, wandering everywhere in the house to be confined only in the basement. My heart bled when it was decided that they are going to be kept on leash always. I finally decided that I cannot be so selfish, compromise my own values and chain another being. Even before they were brought home, I had decided that they will be let free, they wont be tied, and they are going to be treated like family members; but that was not what was happening for whatever reasons. I had to let go of them.



Hopefully they will be sent off to greener pastures. I dropped them off to mom’s place yesterday from where they will be picked up by this person who will be taking them away to his village. I hope Keechu and Kateena will find joy and peace in their new home, where they get purer air, water, environment and love. I am assured that they will get more company and a lot of freedom. Arun was trying to convince me that its for their good that they need to go, and they will be happier there. He was explaining that its not fair for me to keep them chained at home, just because I loved them. The explanation was more or less the same that I had given to Prithvi and Parnika hours before. I didn’t feel as confident as I did when I had to tell them why we had to let them go, when I had to say bye to Keechu and Kateena. The mind understands all this, the heart takes more time. It does understand in the end, because it loves. Dogs are not called man’s best friend for no reason. Whoever say that they cant talk, haven’t tried to listen to them. There were a hundred words in those confused eyes, loads of apprehension in those worried faces. A thousand questions in those barks for which I didn’t have answers. I only ask for forgiveness.



The person affected the most in all this is my sister in law at home, who actually took care of these babies and brought them up. When we were out at work, school, she was the one who spent the day at home with them. I can only imagine the void that she experiences now, whenever she steps into the basement, whenever it is time for their meals. I hope she forgives me too, I am her culprit for bring them to her and then taking them away from her.

Today when I go back home from work, I wont hear that familiar bark, they wont be there to jump on me and welcome me home … I will always miss them.

Despicable or Valued?

Came at its will, went away by its wish
Was never yours, thief you were named
Did it exist? so fragile it would break if touched
A breeze blew; for shattering it your were blamed

Fruits of your love rendering you helpless
Life seems to be worthless and despicable
Stranded spineless by your own touchstone
To you and only yourself, you are answerable

Lips to be sewn, pertinacities given up
Growing out of the fondly killing affinities
Obstinate habits to be rooted up
Valued you will be by one and all (?)



The last stanza is from
ಹೊಲಿಬೇಕು ತುಟಿಗಳನು
ಬಲಿತೆಗೆವ ಹಠಗಳನು
ಒಲಿದೊಲಿದು ಕೊಲುವಂಥ
ನೆಲೆಯಾದ ಚಟಗಳನು
ಬೆಲೆಯಲ್ಲವೆ ಆಗ - ಕ್ಷಿತಿಜ

Kick that butt

Picture this; a smoke in one hand and baby in the other. The baby in his arms was not more than six to eight months. He takes a puff from his cigarette and then plants a kiss on his baby’s cheeks.
This was a scene I saw in front of a super market last evening. Do these people really love their kids?

Its probably a little difficult to make the innocent understand, much more difficult to make the ignorant realize that they need to understand. But what do we do with these ‘educated’ group who don’t even want to try to kick that butt? And you will have to listen to their ‘logical’ reasoning for not having to try to quit the habit if at all you try making them understand. I agree all of us have to die one day, non-smokers are not going to stick here forever. But do you really need to make it so much more difficult for others when you leave the world? And you claim you love them? Hypocrites!!!

'World no tobacco day' came and went ... but you dont need this day to decide to give up your slavery to tobacco. That baby would have been more fortunate if the dad didnt smoke, even if he didnt kiss.

Into High School

Dropping off your child to the school on the first day is always very emotional. Most parents can never forget that experience, most parents will have tears in their eyes when they have to turn their backs at the screaming child. These tears are not result of fear or sadness. Now a day’s most parents do a major research before they would have chosen the school for their child. I wont be surprised if they pay heavily and outsource the research to a third party. (Do I see an entrepreneurial opportunity there?) The tears are because of the unknown. The tears are because of the overwhelming emotion caused due to the fact that you suddenly realize that your little angel has grown and you need to release it out of your cocoon so that it faces the world.

My baby who arrived in this world 6 weeks before he was expected was really fragile. He was so tiny that he would slip from my hands when I tried to hold him. He was so weak that he could not even suckle. He was so feeble that I could hardly hear him crying through the incubator he was placed in for a week. Prithvi is a teenager now. Unfortunately, this boy has had a bigger share of hardships compared to other boys of his age, me being the cause of most of it. I should say that he has taken it well and handled it well. The fragile baby has grown into a strong boy. Im proud of him though he didn’t get a first class in his 7th, most other kids probably wouldn’t have managed to even clear the exams at all if they had to go through what Prithvi has been through last year. Its easy for others to give gyaan and say ‘Don’t you push him to do better?’ – which parent does not do it?, ‘you should make sure that your problems does not have an impact on the kid’ – easier said than done!, ‘colleges demand 90% + for admissions’ – I havent been vacationing on the moon, ‘it’s a competitive world out there and you need to ensure that the kid score at least a first class’- Wow … now how do I ‘ensure’? Havent we all read enough cases where children succumb to parental pressure? Should I pressurize my child because I need to be able to boast in front of the society? Is my child dumb just because his scores in school is average? Isnt it my duty to realize my kids’ capacity before I push him off the ridge? Just because I don’t discuss, does it mean I am not doing anything about it at all? I am considered unreasonable and accused of taking things in a casual way. If realizing my child’s capability, supporting him, not reprimanding him for not securing a first class, changing over to the state syllabus from ICSE; is being unreasonable then I am fine with being unreasonable. If I don’t get worked up, get hysterical about things and that I don’t discuss everything that I do to motivate my child, and ‘push’ him, is considered as taking things in a casual way, then so be it. And people should realize that each child is unique, each child needs to be handled differently. What is working for your 4 year old might not work for somebody’s else’s teenage boy. When you are talking to a parent, you should remember that the parent knows his or her child better than you do.

Today was Prithvi’s first day at the High School. He couldn’t eat last night, and Im sure he didn’t sleep well. He was anxious about the morning. Though he has been in the same school for the past 10 years, he is moving into a different syllabus. He might not have the same classmates now, he will have to make new friends, he has a new language to learn and a whole set of new challenges to deal with… not to mention the hormones that probably would start pumping in his body now as he steps over to the teens. There is a horde of evils waiting outside to grab the gullible kids. All I told him was ‘Say no to all wrong things, first time and everytime’, he screwed up his face and gave me a ‘what are you talking about’ look. I gave him the advice which I have learnt – the hard way. ‘If you cannot tell your parents about something you are doing, if you feel you need to hide things from them, then you are doing something wrong’. I guess he understood, because he smiled and said ‘ok’, when I dropped him off at the school, just as I had done 10 years ago. I hope and pray that I have given him something good, atleast this time. Love you my son.

At the Himalayas... finally!

‘Wow’ is all I could say when I saw the Himalayas. I bet, that’s all most people can say. Words fail anybody who is witnessing these mountains, atleast initially. What comes after that is – its Majestic, Magnificent and Magical … it has an humbling effect. I know, its clichéd, but nothing else can describe how humbled you feel in front of these magical, magnificent mountains which stand tall and majestic :-).

Long ago, a friend of mine had advised me that it’s a great idea to go on annual family trips, it bonds the family plus gives a lot to remember and talk about later in life. I have tried to follow this, as much as possible. So, we decided to pay a visit to Gangtok and Darjeeling.

We were driven to Gangtok from NJP, I had to keep the window closed as the driver had a very nasty habit of spitting out of the window every 10 minutes. On the way I kept looking at all the hill ranges that we were passing by. I was not ready to believe I was looking at The Himalayas. I was not expecting it to be green, isn’t it supposed to be white? Are these really the Himalayan ranges? Maybe I will see them after we reach Gangtok … a constant conversation going on in my head. Gangtok was cool and very pleasant when we reached there, and the mountains were …. Green. I messaged Arun who replied back saying “you are looking at the Himalayas in summer… that too at a height of about 5500ft, it will be green” … and I couldn’t accept it. It rained that evening, it rained cats and dogs and hailstones bigger than I have ever seen.
Next day started early as we wanted to go to Nathu La. I was promised snow there … was eager to get there. The journey to Nathu La was breathtaking. The roads which are still being constructed are not very smooth, but the drivers are tops, and the surrounding is very scenic. I was ecstatic when I saw one of the snow capped mountain peak. I was finally there, in the laps of my love, my first glimpse of the real Himalayas :-).



All along the way up we were thinking about the drive back, driving downhill would be scarier. The beeline of vans which were moving up hill indicated that there were going to be a lot of people at Nathu La, and we were not wrong. It was bone chilling cold when we arrived there, we were around 14400 ft above sea level at this Himalayan pass which marks the border between Tibet and India. A lot of cross border trading happen here where India and China exchange goods. A trade market opens every year when people cross the border and come to India for trading. The cold and the rapid ascent of more than 6000 feet was too much for all of us to take. Kids, who were so eager to see the snow and play were disappointed when they realized that the snow is actually not as soft as it appears in Chronicles of Narnia when Lucy wanders off through the cupboard. They opted to stay back in the vehicle while me and hubby proceeded towards the border. We didn’t go very far before it started snowing. We were breathless and came back after reaching a café that’s supposed to be the highest cyber café.. wonder why one would need a cyber café there.
Our next stop was going to be the Baba Mandir. Our driver for the day turned out to be a pretty influential person and hence we skipped the tourists’ Baba Mandir and headed for the original mandir which is further up (where you need special permission from local police). Here, a bottle of mineral water is offered to Baba and it is believed that your wish will come true. They say that you can retrieve your water bottle when you come back next time, they make you mark your bottle so that you can recognize it when you go back again. The original mandir was flocked by our army personnel. We got to see Baba’s bunker too. The food that was served as the prasada was yum. I think between Prasanna and me, we had about 6 cups of kheer. Two of our jawans hitch hiked with us on the way back. They wanted to be dropped off at their brigade, their vehicle had started off earlier. On the way back we saw the ‘Elephant Lake’, named after its shape and the highest golf course in the world. I am not sure if anyone plays golf there.
Tsangmo lake was to be the last point for the day. This place is so picturesque that its easily one of the most beautiful places anyone can see. This lake freezes completely (as does most of the lakes around here) during winter.



Cold, altitude and travel sickness had made all of us tired, none of us were interested on mounting the yaks and taking pictures. You cant miss looking at this wonder of the nature just because you are tired. We feasted our eyes and moved ahead.





Weather was getting worse, it was pouring and we were completely covered in the fog. I couldn’t see anything beyond 2 feet (ya ya, I was wearing my glasses). I asked the driver if he can manage to drive, in whatever little hindi I knew. Looks like he understood… he made us feel at ease and said he would take us back to the hotel safely… and he did. It was an adventure filled day.
The next day in Gangtok was for local sight seeing where we covered a Jain Stupa, a handicraft place, flower show, research institute of Tibetology and Jhakri water falls, it was a light day but we didn’t complain.

We woke up to a raining morning next day, we were supposed to travel to Darjeeling. The weather cleared pretty much before we reached Darjeeling. Darjeeling was a lot more crowded than I thought it would be. Our hotel was right in the middle of a market place. We decided to quickly go around the market in the evening and tuck in early. We needed an early start the next day, we had to get up before the sun did. Our transport was ready at 3.45 and we drove to Tiger hills. Loads of people braving the cold had assembled there to see the spectacular sun rise and to get a glimpse of Kanchenjunga, and with any luck the Everest itself (I don’t know how much of ‘Everest’ is true). The weather had other plans, it had decided to play the spoilsport and not allow us to see the sun rise at all. The sun happily rose behind the clouds as we all waited to see him rise. He missed out on all the wonderful memories that he could be part of. Or maybe he was sick and tired of seeing people sipping coffee in plastic cups and polluting the Tiger hills by throwing them wherever they wanted.
We visited the Ghoom monastery and the Batasia loop on our way back. The guy with binoculars in Batasia loop showed us some ‘important’ points in Darjeeling according to him… ‘the palace where Rajesh Khanna sings Meri Sapnonki Rani’ , ‘the school where Main Hoon Na was shot’ … duh!
Our driver for the day “Kurum” was aged and very well informed. I think he used to be a teacher, the way he used to explain everything. He told us that Tiger Hills standing at 8600ft is the highest point in Darjeeling and that Darjeeling railway station (7400ft) is the highest railway station in India (world?). He reminded us of ‘Koda’ of Brother Bear when he told us his name … Ku-rum … just the way Koda tells his name to Keenai.
There were quite a few points to visit for the rest of the day. We started off with the Gangamaya park and the Rock Garden – both are man made parks built around some naturally existing landscapes and falls. This are about 5500ft below Darjeeling, the distance was not much, making the drive pretty steep downhill. We visited the Himalayan Mountaineering Institute – which was very informative and the Padmaja Naidu Himalayan Zoological Park, followed by brief visits to the Tenzing and Gombu Rock. These are rocks where HMI students are trained, named after the great mountaineers. We paid a visit to the tibetian refugee center and a tea estate before we called it a day. We were wrong, the best time of the day was yet to arrive. The clouds cleared for an hour or so and there it was ‘The Kancehnjunga’. It was simply on top of the world, it was so high above that it seemed to be a part of the sky. It was a lovely sight to behold. I am afraid the photo is not even half as good as the real one.



We had the whole of next day at our disposal before we had to start to NJP late in the afternoon. We walked up to a place called the ‘Chowrasta’ and spent some time.

An interesting fact that we observed here was that women did most of the work in these places. Men were either driving or doing nothing. Women worked in the tea estates, manned the shops, did sales, worked in handicraft centres, cooked … you name it. They were there on the road at 4am in the morning trying to get a lift to where ever they had to go for work!

We got to spend a day each both onward and return journeys in Kolkata. Visited a few places of interest there, I was impressed by the Sceince city. The taxi drivers there could easily give a complex to Chennai auto drivers. I think we were more scared of the drives in Kolkata than the ones on the mountains.

The anti climax of the whole vacation was that, I lost all the photos before I could download them. My memory card got corrupted. All the photos are captured through our eyes and saved in the grey matter. And of course, some of the photos that I have posted here, courtesy – cell phones. Long live mobile phone cameras :-).

Some memorable moments before I close:

• The cuppa that I shared with hubby in the balcony of our Gangtok hotel room, with a wonderful view of the mountains.
• The first glimpse of the Himalayas, a snow capped peak.
• The moment when all of us went ‘wow’ as soon as we came to the curve which brought Tsangmo lake into our line of vision.
• We got down at Nathu La and hubby said – “chaLi andre enu antha eeg gothaaytu”!!
• The happy look on Pari’s and Prithvi’s faces when they saw the snow, their disappointed look when they touched it and tried playing with it.
• The scream of joy when kids discovered that they get maggi in hotels!
• The relief we felt when we were offered amazing food at Baba mandir.
• The apprehension we felt when we drove back from Nathu La, and the road was completely covered in fog.
• The joy I felt when I had the perfect photo of a rose like flower, shot using macro.
• The fresh carrots we ate on the way to Darjeeling.
• The disappointment of not being able to see the sun rise in Darjeeling
• The moment we witnessed the graceful, beautiful Kanchenjunga.
• The moment I saw the message “No Image” when I tried to download photos.


Wow, that’s more than a dozen…. Proves that the trip was worth it!

Its been a long wait ...

Its been a long wait. I am eagerly looking forward to witness one of the nature’s best creations – The Himalayas.
The Himalayas has been one of my love interests from quite a few years, all my attempts to visit it had been futile till now – an attempt to make it an adventure trip, a fantasy of honeymooning there, making it a religious trip etc … Finally a holiday with the family is happening near these lovely mountains where I can feast my eyes looking it, enjoy being a part of it, ticking off one more item on my bucket list :-). Being so near, being amidst these mountain ranges should definitely be magical. And God knows I do need divine and magical influence.

Himalayas … here I come!!!